| It’s been said that many years ago, way back in 2021, there lived a masked fella that roamed the halls and baseball field at Red Bank High School. He didn’t wear a mask cause he was a villain or outlaw, but cause there was a horrible pandemic that had spread throughout the world. He was called ET. Now some say that stood for Extremely Talented, some say it meant Extremely Tall, cause he was said to be well over 6 feet tall. Oh and it’s said he was “eye candy” for them gals and a popular fella too. He even was picked to be on the Mr. Red Bank court for the prettiest fella in the whole school or somethin like that. Heck, he had gals after him all the time and had a pretty gal hangin on him at the ceremonies and hear tell of her even goin to his ballgames to cheer on her beau. Ya see folks, he was such a kind and lovin fella that everybody loved him right back. Hey, now he wasn’t always perfect. It was told that if he ever got outta line, his baseball hitting coach would just say, “Hey boy! Don’t make me tell Bailee!” Ha! Now for some reason that would snap that fella right back into line. Legend says he was pretty good at “book lurnin.” He was one of the top lurners in the whole senior class. He was in somethin called the Beta Club. Guess he didn’t make the Alpah one. He got the Francis Hysinger Award, John Williams Balfour Award, UTC Scholarship, and the Fairbanks/Harvey Memorial Scholarship. Heck, it was told he even got some kinda award for being able to count real good. Some kind of math genius award. The funny thing is his baseball teammates said he always led the baseball chant and never got past ONE TWO THREE RED BANK! I guess he was a humble fella too. Didn’t want to show off that “book lurnin.” And, oh man, legend says that fella was pretty darn good on that there baseball diamond. Old timers say he could play third base, outfield, catch and pitch. Bless his heart, he plum nearly didn’t get to play. He hurt his knee in P.E. playing basketball and was out for a spell. So anyhow, that ET could really catch and they say he had a hose and could throw out a guy at any base. Ole ET really caught on fire the end of his senior year. As it’s told by his feller teammates, he hit a bomb of a dinger one game. Now this may seem a bit fishy, but legend says he came to bat again in the same inning of that there same game with the bases loaded, and WHAM! he hit one to the fence, and used them long lanky legs to get around all them bases in a flash for, YES!, you got it, an inside the park GRAND SALAMI!!! That boy was fast. I reckon he was for sure. Now wait, I ain’t done yet. Legend says that same week, that tall, lanky, drink of water, went out there on that mound at his last game played on his home field, and you ain’t gonna believe this, but he throwed a NO HITTER!!! Now what about that right there. Some say he almost had a perfect game except he hit this fella named “Biscuit.” Guess ole ET had too much “gravy” on that inside fastball. Now this is where we close this chapter of The Legend of ET. It’s been said, that after gradumacation, he was headed to Texas to lurn how to be one of them fellas that climbs electric poles and gets way up high in them scary bucket trucks to help keep folks power goin so they can keep watchin all them good ole baseball games on tv. The sky was the limit for that there wonderful young fella. Well at least as high as them buckets go up. By the way, if you ever run into anybody that knowed that fella, they will tell you he was smilin all the time and one of the nicest fellas you could ever know. The word Legend means, a historical story that can’t be authenticated. Well, if any of yuns are ever at the beach in Clearwater, look for an ole beach bum named Coach Carter. He’s got long hair and wearin a Yankees cap, sittin with his charming and lovely gal, Emily, that keeps him in line. Oh and he’s probably eatin a peanut butter samech and warshin it down with some chocolate milk. I darn near guarantee you he will tell you it ain’t no legend if it’s all true!!! |
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